Were so self-important. Ever. It will not be with jack-boots. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote - Goodreads.com I think the life cycle is all backwards. George Carlin Quotes - BrainyQuote googletag.pubads().setTargeting("resource", "author_22782"); Required fields are marked *. George Carlin political quotes may seem sensitive, but they inspire necessary conversations. One can never know for sure what a deserted area can look like. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. fetchBids: function() { And I didnt really care in the first place.George Carlin, Dont confuse me with those who cling to hope. They own you. The upper class: keeps all of the money, pays none of the taxes. Thats the only thing keeping it and expanding it wherever possible. Beneath George Carlins biting sarcasm and razor-sharp wit lay a heartfelt indignation at the injustices he observed in the world around him. 2023 Inspirationfeed. 50 The Alchemist Quotes To Make You Follow Your Dreams, 195 Best Cobra Kai Quotes (Seasons 1 5), 70 Attack On Titan Quotes That Will Inspire Greatness, 37 The Lion King Quotes Filled With Powerful Life Lessons, Your email address will not be published. In this blog post, well take a look at some of Carlins most famous quotes on government. Don't forget: YOU have the power to make ANYTHING happen. return cookiePair[1]; Thats the problem. George Carlin Quotes on Politics - LiveAbout But again, because of the small budget, in science class we couldnt afford to do experiments in order to prove theories. His critical thinking shines on stage and opens your eyes to modern-day problems that most folks are oblivious to. Its interested in its own power. George Denis Patrick Carlin was born May 12, 1937, in the Bronx, New York. "Application": "GoodreadsMonolith", You know why? The game is rigged and nobody seems to notice. //]]> function(a9, a, p, s, t, A, g) { All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another. George Carlin, 69. Its so fuckin heroic. George Carlin, Most people work just hard enough not to get firedand get paid just enough not to quit. George Carlin, Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. George Carlin, If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre going to have selfish, ignorant leaders. George Carlin, Theres no present. Cause pretty soon they have little hats. 4994. Keep em showing up at those jobs. George Carlin, 81. George Carlin died on June 22, 2008, from cardiac failure at the age of 71. We havent tried that for a while. Press Enter / Return to begin your search. It's what our system produces: Garbage in, garbage out. Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breaths away. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. George Carlin, 43. The real reason that we cant have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not commit adultery, and Thou shalt not lie in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. //]]> Did you ever stop to think about all the people we kill? They want more for themselves and less for everybody else, but I'll tell you what they don't want: They don't want a population of citizens capable of critical thinking. Im not sure thats the way to fight discrimination. The first one is: 'Never believe ANYthing the government says.' George Carlin Believe, Government, Rules To Live By 48 Copy quote Tell people an invisible man in the sky created all things, they believe you. Its so f***ing heroic. Its a great feeling. He Was Fatally Beaten by Memphis Police Now People Around the World Are Sharing #SunsetsForTyre in His Honor, 41 Daughter Quotes That Will Touch and Melt Your Heart, 20 Most Inspiring Martin Luther King Jr. Hes just sayin that stuff. Good. Most people with low self-esteem have earned it. George Carlin, 29. Question it, and try to see the world for what it actually is, as opposed to what someone or some company or some organization or some government is trying to represent it as, or present it as, however they've mislabeled it or dressed it up or told you. }("apstag", window, document, "script", "//c.amazon-adsystem.com/aax2/apstag.js"); Some people see the glass half full, others see it half empty. Here is one I would suggest: Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was. gads.async = true; I dont believe anything the government tells me., Governments dont want well-informed, well-educated people capable of critical thinking. Everything He ever makesdies.George Carlin, Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?George Carlin, Thats why they call it the American Dream because you have to be asleep to believe it.George Carlin, May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.George Carlin, Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.George Carlin, There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. Lists. Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky. window.Mobvious.device_type = 'mobile'; It can help you a lot.George Carlin, Isnt making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?George Carlin, I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, There is no I in team. What you should tell them is, Maybe not. A.src = t; George Carlin was no stranger to controversy. " George Carlin Quotes "Most of the country was founded by slave owners so they could be free. October 29, 2004. Weve added years to life, not life to years. George Carlin, 6. We have the war on crime, the war on cancer, the war on drugs. [CDATA[ I love individuals. It is one that we need to function as a society. Welcome | QuoteSaga It will be Nikesneakers and Smiley shirts. George Carlin, The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. George Carlin, If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin, By and large, languageis a tool for concealing the truth. George Carlin, Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin, Religion is like a pair of shoesFind one that fits for you, but dont make me wear your shoes. George Carlin, I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres theself-helpsection? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. George Carlin, If it requires a uniform, its a worthless endeavor. George Carlin, Atheism is a non-prophet organization. George Carlin, How is it possible to have a civil war? George Carlin, When you step on the brakes, your life is in your foots hands. George Carlin, I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, There is no I in team. What you should tell them is, Maybe not. Let me know in the comments below and please share this post. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place. Life is a zero sum game. George Carlin, 36. [CDATA[ return false; 2. Here we are sharing a collection of George Carlin quotes on religion, government, and life for you to think deeply about the things you have never done before. Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. Goalcast is an inspiring community for achievers dedicated to helping you improve all aspects of your life. You have no choice. If the parent corporation doesn't want you to know something, it won't be on the news. I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen. George Carlin Quotes Government George Carlin American Comedian born on May 12, 1937, died on June 22, 2008 George Denis Patrick Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, social critic, actor, and author. "CacheDetection.RequestID": "RW7VD4AVX1H9239WWVVN", In fact, George Carlin had some pretty interesting things to say about government. Because theres no money in that problem. Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. A good motto to live by: Always try not to get killed. In America, anyone can become president. Just because you got the monkey off your back, doesnt mean the circus has left town. (function () { But he loves you. > Quotable Quote. The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. That's the problem. If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. He was born May 12, 1937, in New York City into an Irish Catholic family, but he rejected the faith. George Carlin quotes on the American government In America, anyone can become president. The first one is: 'Never believe ANYthing the government says.'. Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life. George Carlin, 5. Or, at the very least, it will be slanted to suit them, and then rarely followed up. George Carlin, 64. BAM! And armbands. I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, There is no I in team. What you should tell them is, Maybe not. Disclaimer: As an Amazon Associate We earn from qualifying purchases. We and our partners use cookies to Store and/or access information on a device. And, let me tell you, theres nothin like it. 100 George Carlin Funny Quotes On Religion, Stupid People - George Carlin profile quotes. "Governments don't want a population capable of critical thinking, they want obedient workers, people just smart enough to run the machines and just dumb enough to passively accept their situation." George Carlin Read more quotes from George Carlin Share this quote: Like Quote Recommend to friends Friends Who Liked This Quote Inspirational George Carlin Quotes 1. We dont even know how to take care of ourselves; we havent learned how to care for one another. You have owners. He's the subject of a new documentary. //]]> If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse. 3. The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions. George Carlin, 87. 21 George Carlin Quotes On Government And Politics var gptAdSlots = gptAdSlots || []; } Get future posts byemail,oryou can follow us onInstagram,Pinterest,andFacebook. googletag.enableServices(); The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. George Carlin, 13. stylesheet.rel = "stylesheet"; Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.George Carlin, Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink,I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuckGeorge Carlin, I tried to believe that there is a God, who created each of us in His own image and likeness, loves us very much, and keeps a close eye on things. George Carlin Quotes Government : "Most of the government wants to control information and language so that it can control you. 3140. I hate groups of people. Hope these quotes will give you a different perspective on government and how it works. Whether you agree with him or not, Carlins views are definitely worth considering. #privileges. googletag.pubads().enableAsyncRendering(); Couldnt you just skip the praying part and go right to His Will? The government doesnt care about you, or your children, or your rights, or your welfare, or your safety. The reason I talk to myself is that Im the only one whose answers I accept.George Carlin. You and I are not in the big club. Don't forget to confirm subscription in your email. Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days Ive stayed alive. Its important in life if you dont give a shit. 50 Motivational George Carlin Quotes For Success Then you live in an old age home. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. Carlin was known for his dark comedy and reflections on politics, religion, psychology, language and taboo subjects. Thats exactly what I want you to think. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. What really ought to be said after one of these so-called tragedies is, Let the scarring begin.George Carlin,When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? My first rule, I dont believe anything the government tells me And I dont take very seriously the media or the press in this country. George Carlin, 82. Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesnt mean the circus has left town. George Carlin, 23. I look at war a little. " George Carlin 15. Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. George Carlin, 45. }; They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience. George Carlin, I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote - Goodreads About Us | Privacy Policy | Terms | Contact Us, Ronald Reagan Religious Quotes To Live Your Life As A True Believer, www.brainyquote.com/authors/george-carlin-quotes, www.quotes.thefamouspeople.com/george-carlin-1484.php, www.everydaypower.com/george-carlin-quotes. Im completely in favour of the separation of Church and State. I started this website because I wanted to help people like you to maximize their potential and achieve their dreams. Weve added years to life, not life to years. apstag.init({ Theres a humorous side to every situation. All rights reserved. So, we must be clear about our expectations for government and its role in our lives. George Carlin Sayings and Quotes about life! Share your thoughts in the comments below! We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass. George Carlin, 79. They'll get it all from you sooner or later 'cause they own this f**kin' place. 5. Never argue with an idiot. If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. } You get kicked out when youre too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. Soon enough youll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, You show me a lazy prick whos lying in bed all day, watching TV, only occasionally getting up to piss, and Ill show you a guy whos not causing any trouble. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, I have lots of ideas. - George Carlin profile quotes. Do not believe anything the government tells you - George Carlin Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. Who the fuck is going to invade the US? - George Carlin quotes. War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle-class and lower-class men off to die. George Carlin, 78. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.. War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. George Carlin, 42. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience." - George Carlin 2. }); I love individuals. q("f", arguments) Whether youre looking for inspirational or funny quotes by George Carlin or whether youre looking for his famous quotes politics and education, its all here. var ue_id = "RW7VD4AVX1H9239WWVVN"; Looking for the best George Carlin quotes? Theyve long since bought, and paid for the Senate, the Congress, the State houses, the city halls, they got the judges in their back pockets and they own all the big media companies, so they control just about all of the news and information you get to hear. George Carlin, 63. George Carlin Quotes - BrainyQuote. They're imaginary. Laugh often, long and loud. What exactly is viewer discretion? Lets get started! Thats the only thing keeping it and expanding it wherever possible. George Carlin, 57. Planet, species, race, nation, state, religion, party, union, club, association, neighborhood improvement committee; I have no interest in any of it. The people are fucked! George Carlin, 80. }); 123 Witty George Carlin Quotes on Life and Politics - Internet Pillar 'Cause pretty soon they have little hats. Your dog thinks you're a god. Im sure it made the work seem that much more urgent. George Carlin, 27. Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. I think people should be allowed to do what they want. The poor are just there just to scare the shit out of the middle class. url = "https://s.gr-assets.com/assets/mobile/phone_images-9e9093f0cfddba8c2b1e815375d976a3.css"; They want obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. Laugh until you gasp for breath.George Carlin, The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.George Carlin, Honesty may be the best policy, but its important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.George Carlin, People always tell me Have a nice day. Well what if I dont want to? George Carlin. The people are fucked." George Carlin tags: funny , humanity , humor 8709 likes Like Think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of them are stupider than that. George Carlin, 40. The Grammy-Award-winning star of 14 stand-up comedy specials on HBO, George Carlin was widely considered one of Americans most influential comedians. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("gr_author", "false"); God has a three-day weekend.George Carlin, Theres a humorous side to every situation. George Carlin, Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.George Carlin, I, myself, have killed six people.

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